Is anyone else disappointed that Donald Trump is no longer running for President? He never said that he was officially running for President, but it was more than a mere flirtation. The Donald had rounded second and still had a firm grasp of titty when he finally pulled the plug.
As only the Donald could, in advising that he would not be seeking the Republican nomination he stated that he “maintain[ed] the strong conviction that if I were to run, I would be able to win the primary and ultimately, the general election.” And the truly sad part is, I’m not sure the egomaniac is wrong. Republicans have clearly lost their fucking minds ever since a black man was elected President and they just might have been crazy enough to hand over the nomination to a guy whose greatest accomplishments have been the perfection of the combover and trying unsuccessfully to trademark the term “You’re Fired.” And really if you can outfox Gary Busey and Meatloaf, well that’s more than George W could ever lay claim to.
This is a man who claims victory no matter what evidence to the contrary exists. After months of haranguing Obama about his birth status, he claimed victory when Obama released his birth certificate. “I’m very proud of myself because I’ve accomplished something that nobody else has been able to accomplish. I’m really honored.” So everything you were spouting off about for months was proven wrong in one fell swoop and you’re very proud of yourself?
In a way, he reminds of my favorite dictator, Kim Jong Il. Almost everything out of his mouth is complete bullshit, but, and this is the key, he truly believes every word of it. So it almost becomes an existential question, can it really be bullshit if he believes it? As the great George Costanza said when Jerry was asking him to teach him to lie, “Jerry, just remember, it’s not a lie if you believe it.”
Trump being elected President, or at least running as the Republican nominee, was the only thing that could save the rotting cesspool that Saturday Night Live has become and I for one am truly sad.