I’ve tried my best to keep my posts about the NBA playoffs to a minimum, but I can’t keep quiet any longer. This is quite possibly the best finals in the last ten or twenty years. The overmatched lone gunslinger (Dirk Nowitski) against the group of talented but heartless mercenaries (LeBron, Wade and Bosh). Everyone outside of Miami-Dade County hoping for the Mavs, or barring that some sort of zombie apocalypse to keep the Heat from winning the title. LeBron James shrinking as the pressure mounts for the second consecutive year (although the guy is pretty fucking talented when people say he had a shit game after he posted a triple double).
But there is one thing notably absent. Where is Mark Cuban in all this? Sure, I saw him signing autographs in a sleeveless shirt (not kidding, for the love of God, Mark, keep those hairy hamhocks covered), but where has the loudest mouth in the NBA been? No outbursts at all. But I’ll still be watching the Larry O’Brien trophy presentation if the Mavs can manage to win one of the next two in Miami to see if Cuban goes all Big Ern McCracken on David Stern.
And on a completely separate note, if any of my readers happen to be single men looking for love, look no further: