This being a historic day and all, I thought I’d memorialize it with a week in review. Historic day, you ask. Yes it is.
Where were you seventeen years ago today? Probably watching the world’s slowest police chase of all time unfold on live tv. That’s right, seventeen years ago today, Orenthal James Simpson was riding shotgun in a white Ford Bronco piloted by his friend and former teammate Al Cowlings (“My name is AC. You know who I am, Goddamnit.”) as a phalanx of police cars chased them at speeds reproducable by most country club golf carts if the regulator is disabled.
So, the week in review.
My hometown Vancouver Canucks lost game 7 of the Stanley Cup finals leading to an all out riot that made downtown Vancouver more closely resemble Beirut circa 1983 and led to the following iconic picture:
Nothing gets me randier than a few canisters of tear gas and the smell of burning garbage.
Also, the Dallas Mavericks defeated the Superfriend Miami Heat in game 6 of the NBA finals. Dirk Nowitski is finally bigger in his home country of Germany than David Hasselhoff.
Anthony Weiner buckled to the pressure and resigned from Congress…Or, he finally saw the light and realized that he was wasting his talents in politics when he could be unleashing that monster snake of his on porn stars all over the San Bernandino Valley.